tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1922391391723479936.post3039859058226805784..comments2024-02-15T13:59:51.639-05:00Comments on In view of God's mercy: The Frowning Providence of MiscarriageCourtney Reissighttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17570038465761855865noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1922391391723479936.post-17749235879995483332014-06-12T13:26:03.929-04:002014-06-12T13:26:03.929-04:00I am sorry for your loss. I've been there too....I am sorry for your loss. I've been there too.<br />I realize that by the time you posted this, I was having a miscarriage as well.<br /><br />I became pregnant for the second time when my first son was only 6 months! I was so happy, and actually it was an answer to my prayers, because we wanted a sibling close in age to our first child.<br />I gave glory to God for it was a surprise! I was brestfeeding a lot too. I posted on Facebook a "hint" about our joy, with praises to the Lord.<br /><br />At 6 weeks all the blood tests were ok, the heartbeat on the ultrasound... all ok but one thing: my thyroid hormone levels showed out of whack, too overactive but the doctors did not seem alarmed. They just said we needed to keep an eye on it to see how it evolves.<br />Honestly, I wasn't afraid neither, I prayed and trusted the Lord would not give us a pregnancy only to be destroyed. I proclaimed to my unbelievers friends and my pastor at church that the Lord is good and my baby was in his hands.<br /><br />At 10 weeks, I started feeling very bad. My thyroid levels got worst, too overactive for the gestational age. <br />One day, I started loosing a bit of brown blood, and feeling miserable, I could feel something very bad was going on. <br />I hated every inch of my body. I even wanted to not be pregnant anymore but I trusted God would protect us and give me strength.<br /><br />The next day I learned in the doctors office, by looking the ultrasound image that my little one stopped growing at 8 weeks or so. <br />The most shocking part was to see that little creature not moving at all, no heartbeat, so lifeless but so real. The u/s image is unforgettable.<br />My hubby and I were devastaded to say the least.<br />I could not believe it because I was so faithful! or at least that is what I thought...<br /><br />My d&c was on March 6. Even on that day I still had hope that maybe God would put him life and a heartbeat again, but no. The doctors confirmed it was dead.<br />They added those kind of procedures was routine.<br /><br />I could accept it, and hubby and I are well and hopeful again. But since the day we lost our pregnancy, every time I have my period, it reminds me of the pain. I even have physical pain.<br /><br />The hardest part is when I remember that I trusted God. I never never thought he would allow it to happen. But he did. So it was a huge disappointment for me. I could feel a mix of shame, despair and frustration along with pain.<br /><br />Deep inside me, I know I'm his child, I just know He's good, and He has good reasons for everything he allows in my life. <br />But I confess that there is that little sting still in there, a deep feeling of injustice. <br /><br />Even with that sting, the one living in me is bigger, and one day...one day, I'll understand. He is good. That I can believe by faith only.<br /><br />I don't talk about this with anyone, people at church don't understand. They under estimate the pain, and some even judge. <br />I tell to my unbeliever friends that God is still good and he has right reasons for allowing everything in Christian persons, even miscarriages. <br /><br />I somehow decided to keep it to myself, only very few people know about my miscarriage. Writing about this feels like a relief... thank you for letting me share this.<br />God bless you!A Sisternoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1922391391723479936.post-69804807383311089192014-03-16T03:14:43.048-04:002014-03-16T03:14:43.048-04:00I am so sorry that you are having to endure this e...I am so sorry that you are having to endure this experience. No words can express the pain that I know you are feeling. Prayers for you and your family during this time of loss.just mehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15712593840698873046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1922391391723479936.post-74905400042576318792014-03-04T03:53:53.274-05:002014-03-04T03:53:53.274-05:00'but trust for his grace'... yes and amen....'but trust for his grace'... yes and amen. thinking of you guys and praying for his mercies to meet you each morning as He has promised. Gracehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08657092901794067927noreply@blogger.com