I think in Christian circles we talk a lot about the necessity for male leadership. It’s not uncommon to hear girls on a college campus or in a youth group bemoan the lack of initiative from men—and honestly, I think sometimes men get a bad wrap. Don’t get me wrong, I think first and foremost we should be encouraging our men to step up, love the Gospel, and lead fervently, and it must start with them. But also, in our movement to raise up male leaders, we must also speak to women.
Godly men will be looking for godly wives, so how are we supposed to live?
I have talked before about the necessity for women to love theology—and I think that ties in here. We should saturate our minds with Scripture. Study it. Love it. Meditate on it. Memorize it. Live by it. As your life is centered around the Word of God, the characteristics of a godly woman will be begin to manifest themselves in your life. Male leadership does not mean that we default to their study of the Word as our sole source of spiritual nourishment. They will give an account for how they lead us, but if we love our Savior we should and will love His Word.
How will the children know if we don’t teach them? And how will we teach the children if we don’t know it, love it, and delight in it ourselves? We are all (men and women) called to know and love our Savior, but our roles as women are to teach women and children (Titus 2:3-5).
As I said earlier in the week, we must not be on a “quest” for a husband. Like the Bride waits unknowingly for her Bridegroom, Jesus Christ—so we too wait unknowingly for our future spouse. We must never assume a friendship is more than a friendship when it begins, lest we consciously or unconsciously take over a situation because of our false intuition. We won’t be able to wait unless we have a deep contentment in Jesus Christ. Waiting causes us to live out the theology that we believe. God’s sovereignty over every detail of our lives causes us to rest in the fact that He holds even the smallest details in His hands—even a man’s affections for us.
Being the pursued means exactly what it implies—waiting. Anything more than that turns into a rebellious, unbelieving spirit like Eve. Manipulation is our forte, isn’t it? And often times we do everything in our power to give the impression that we are patiently waiting, yet we coax the man along passive aggressively. It shows itself in our coordinating of situations so they perfectly leave us alone together so we can surprisingly have to “talk”. When we manipulate we are saying that God cannot be trusted in this situation—therefore we have to do something, anything, to make the situation work according to our liking. We usurp the very thing we desire, male leadership, when we attempt to pursue a man.
This is not easy, and it most certainly is not “normal” based on the world’s standards. Which is exactly why we must strive for this. The world preaches feminism and independence from any form of order (moral or social). But the Bible preaches a beautiful picture of redemption, in a Christ who purchases a Bride for Himself with His own blood. There is joy in waiting. There is joy in being pursued the way Christ pursued His Bride because it is the way God designed it. Operating outside of His prescribed parameters brings a joyless existence—and ultimately death.
In all of these things we must remember that our pursuit of God is not a means to finding a godly husband. If that is our motivation, then we need to do some serious thinking. Our pursuit of God must be because we want to get God—and if He so pleases to give us the gift of marriage then we will gladly take it, but in all of life our delight in Christ must be because of Christ, not because of what we think we might receive. May God bless you and increase your joy as you pursue Him with all of your heart and mind.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Qualities of a Godly Man
Yesterday I talked briefly about the supposed female “predicament” to “finding a husband.” I promised to continue writing about the issue because, like some of you have already pointed out, I recognize that I left the issue far from resolved. Katie and Steve were very observant, and kind, to point out “what are the explicit qualities of a biblical man?” and “how do you know if a man is biblical enough when no man is perfect?”
First, I would encourage anyone reading this to go to www.desiringod.org and read the sermon manuscripts from Pastor John’s two previous sermons on male headship. They are outstanding! He speaks to this issue in ways I would never even be able to.
When talking about the qualities of a godly man instead of getting bogged down in bullet point lists and man-made ideas—we should simply look to the Word of God. If we believe the relationship between Christ and the Church is manifested and displayed in the relationship between a husband and wife, then most certainly the characteristics that define biblical masculinity must come from our Savior Himself.
Ephesians 5:25-28 says: “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”
Christ died for the church. First and foremost a man must be willing to die—which demands an awesome amount of humility and grace. He dies because he has the best interest of his family at heart, mainly their spiritual maturity—so he dies seeking to present them to God blamelessly. A godly man feels the weight of his calling so much so that he knows that one day he will give an account for the way in which he handled and led his own household.
He must constantly be feeding his own soul through personal Bible reading, local church involvement, and reading good books. Why? Because he is the primary one who will be called on to answer the tough questions of the faith—whether at home or in the church.
So what does this mean for single men? Take action now to live a life of male leadership. Study your Bible. Know your Savior. Get involved in your church. Xbox won’t make you into a godly man, only serious devotion to your Savior will. Seek to serve the women in your life by cultivating godly leadership even in friendships. Stand up for the truth, and do not simply sit by when all of the women around you are speaking up—lead by example. You incapacitate yourself for leadership when you are spiritually passive and lazy.
In light of all of this, it may seem quite daunting and weighty. And it should to some degree. But if we look at the whole of Ephesians leading up to this passage we see that this is a fruit of Gospel-living. The Gospel enables men to live this way. Apart from the saving work of Jesus Christ our dead hearts would have no interest in biblical manhood and womanhood. We may feel like Paul who says, “O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?” (Romans 7:24) and we can proclaim with all certainty “Christ will!” because He has delivered us—and raised us to walk in newness of life.
As women, that is where we should rest if men are not acting biblically. Will God give you a man who fulfills all of these qualities right away? Maybe so, maybe not. There must be an element of patience as we are in a relationship with someone who is not leading like we would like. Perfection is not attainable in this life, so the men in our lives will not love us like Christ loved the Church all of the time, and they will not lead us like Christ leads the Church all of the time. We should be looking for evidences of grace that show us that this man is truly seeking to live a God-honoring life through local church involvement and study of the Word. In addition to that, it is important to solicit the prayers and involvement of Godly, wise, older believers who can offer you wise counsel as you navigate through the challenges of male/female relationships.
In all of these things we must remember that we will fail more times than we will get it right. But we have a great Savior who redeems even the vilest of situations for His glory. And He will mold and save a people for Himself because He promised, and we know that He who promised is faithful.
To be continued…
Also, I recognize that there is much that I don’t see and haven’t addressed, so I welcome any input and feedback on what you see in the Bible characterizes a godly man.
(tomorrow, or someday this week, I will address how the Bible says women should be as they wait on God to bring a godly man into their life)
First, I would encourage anyone reading this to go to www.desiringod.org and read the sermon manuscripts from Pastor John’s two previous sermons on male headship. They are outstanding! He speaks to this issue in ways I would never even be able to.
When talking about the qualities of a godly man instead of getting bogged down in bullet point lists and man-made ideas—we should simply look to the Word of God. If we believe the relationship between Christ and the Church is manifested and displayed in the relationship between a husband and wife, then most certainly the characteristics that define biblical masculinity must come from our Savior Himself.
Ephesians 5:25-28 says: “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”
Christ died for the church. First and foremost a man must be willing to die—which demands an awesome amount of humility and grace. He dies because he has the best interest of his family at heart, mainly their spiritual maturity—so he dies seeking to present them to God blamelessly. A godly man feels the weight of his calling so much so that he knows that one day he will give an account for the way in which he handled and led his own household.
He must constantly be feeding his own soul through personal Bible reading, local church involvement, and reading good books. Why? Because he is the primary one who will be called on to answer the tough questions of the faith—whether at home or in the church.
So what does this mean for single men? Take action now to live a life of male leadership. Study your Bible. Know your Savior. Get involved in your church. Xbox won’t make you into a godly man, only serious devotion to your Savior will. Seek to serve the women in your life by cultivating godly leadership even in friendships. Stand up for the truth, and do not simply sit by when all of the women around you are speaking up—lead by example. You incapacitate yourself for leadership when you are spiritually passive and lazy.
In light of all of this, it may seem quite daunting and weighty. And it should to some degree. But if we look at the whole of Ephesians leading up to this passage we see that this is a fruit of Gospel-living. The Gospel enables men to live this way. Apart from the saving work of Jesus Christ our dead hearts would have no interest in biblical manhood and womanhood. We may feel like Paul who says, “O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?” (Romans 7:24) and we can proclaim with all certainty “Christ will!” because He has delivered us—and raised us to walk in newness of life.
As women, that is where we should rest if men are not acting biblically. Will God give you a man who fulfills all of these qualities right away? Maybe so, maybe not. There must be an element of patience as we are in a relationship with someone who is not leading like we would like. Perfection is not attainable in this life, so the men in our lives will not love us like Christ loved the Church all of the time, and they will not lead us like Christ leads the Church all of the time. We should be looking for evidences of grace that show us that this man is truly seeking to live a God-honoring life through local church involvement and study of the Word. In addition to that, it is important to solicit the prayers and involvement of Godly, wise, older believers who can offer you wise counsel as you navigate through the challenges of male/female relationships.
In all of these things we must remember that we will fail more times than we will get it right. But we have a great Savior who redeems even the vilest of situations for His glory. And He will mold and save a people for Himself because He promised, and we know that He who promised is faithful.
To be continued…
Also, I recognize that there is much that I don’t see and haven’t addressed, so I welcome any input and feedback on what you see in the Bible characterizes a godly man.
(tomorrow, or someday this week, I will address how the Bible says women should be as they wait on God to bring a godly man into their life)
Monday, March 26, 2007
Unrealistic Expectations?
My pastor is preaching through some major texts on marriage, which has proven, as always, to be a Gospel-centered time of Bible study and growth. He is currently on male headship and in lieu of his sermon yesterday I found myself in a conversation with a group of young women. To premise this conversation I will give you his three main points that he then fleshed out (and that you can listen to at www.desiringgod.org when they put the sermon up this week). Here they are:
1. Godly, male leadership means spiritual and physical provision
2. Godly, male leadership means spiritual and physical protection
The overwhelming consensus among these women was “we really aren’t ever going to find a man who is like that.” And unfortunately this is not an uncommon concern among young women. I have had many older women tell me “oh honey, good luck finding a man who will lead you. They just aren’t out there.” One of the young women whom I was speaking with yesterday said she had an older woman tell her this week that she should be more realistic in her expectations and not be looking for “Jesus” because He’s not going to come back and marry her.
I graciously disagree with the sentiments of these older women on so many levels, and would venture to say that their ideas about marriage are probably stemming from unmet expectations by the men in their own lives. But is it biblical?
No.
Marriage is the exact way that God has decided to display the mystery of the Gospel—the image of Christ and His Church. Of course He wants us to live according to the Scriptures. The longings of these young women’s hearts are not false hopes and unrealistic expectations—they are longings put there by their Creator because He wants us to display His glory. If God did not want us to strive and desire male leadership then He would not have put it in the Bible for us to examine and live by.
We live in a culture of overwhelmingly low expectations of everything. We have become so desensitized to laziness and conformity that we almost expect our men to sit on the couch with a remote control while they drool on their t-shirts watching NASCAR and Sports Center (not that there is anything wrong with Sports Center, or NASCAR). We must get out of the cultural norms and see what the Bible says about how we should live, instead of embracing complacency. This is not the model for biblical manhood, and we need to begin recognizing it as such. For far too long we have laughed off male (and female) immaturity as simply a fad to be grown out of. But what we are now seeing is that they are not growing out of it—delayed adulthood seems fun. This does not mean, though, that as Christian women we should acquiesce and take the “leftovers”. We must be willing to wait on a godly man, even if it means never getting married, or getting married when we are forty. We are not displaying the mystery of Christ when we hurriedly marry a “Peter Pan-type” man because we are fearful of becoming an old maid.
Secondly, when we expect men to live according to the Scriptures, then we won’t need to “find him”, he will find us. Biblical manhood necessitates pursuing and wooing a woman, because Christ’s relationship to His Bride necessitates Him pursuing and wooing her to Himself. Our desires are correct because they were put there by a loving Father who wants our contentment in our roles to display His glory. But in our desire for a man who leads according to the principles laid out in the Bible, we must not be a on a “quest” for him. Just like our Savior found us in our pig sty and lovingly rescued us, so will our future husband (when the time is right, which we don’t get to decide) lovingly pursue us and bring us to himself.
To be continued…
(I decided because there is so much more I want to say about this, I will talk more in my next post, maybe tomorrow, about biblical womanhood in relation to our desire for a godly man)
1. Godly, male leadership means spiritual and physical provision
2. Godly, male leadership means spiritual and physical protection
The overwhelming consensus among these women was “we really aren’t ever going to find a man who is like that.” And unfortunately this is not an uncommon concern among young women. I have had many older women tell me “oh honey, good luck finding a man who will lead you. They just aren’t out there.” One of the young women whom I was speaking with yesterday said she had an older woman tell her this week that she should be more realistic in her expectations and not be looking for “Jesus” because He’s not going to come back and marry her.
I graciously disagree with the sentiments of these older women on so many levels, and would venture to say that their ideas about marriage are probably stemming from unmet expectations by the men in their own lives. But is it biblical?
No.
Marriage is the exact way that God has decided to display the mystery of the Gospel—the image of Christ and His Church. Of course He wants us to live according to the Scriptures. The longings of these young women’s hearts are not false hopes and unrealistic expectations—they are longings put there by their Creator because He wants us to display His glory. If God did not want us to strive and desire male leadership then He would not have put it in the Bible for us to examine and live by.
We live in a culture of overwhelmingly low expectations of everything. We have become so desensitized to laziness and conformity that we almost expect our men to sit on the couch with a remote control while they drool on their t-shirts watching NASCAR and Sports Center (not that there is anything wrong with Sports Center, or NASCAR). We must get out of the cultural norms and see what the Bible says about how we should live, instead of embracing complacency. This is not the model for biblical manhood, and we need to begin recognizing it as such. For far too long we have laughed off male (and female) immaturity as simply a fad to be grown out of. But what we are now seeing is that they are not growing out of it—delayed adulthood seems fun. This does not mean, though, that as Christian women we should acquiesce and take the “leftovers”. We must be willing to wait on a godly man, even if it means never getting married, or getting married when we are forty. We are not displaying the mystery of Christ when we hurriedly marry a “Peter Pan-type” man because we are fearful of becoming an old maid.
Secondly, when we expect men to live according to the Scriptures, then we won’t need to “find him”, he will find us. Biblical manhood necessitates pursuing and wooing a woman, because Christ’s relationship to His Bride necessitates Him pursuing and wooing her to Himself. Our desires are correct because they were put there by a loving Father who wants our contentment in our roles to display His glory. But in our desire for a man who leads according to the principles laid out in the Bible, we must not be a on a “quest” for him. Just like our Savior found us in our pig sty and lovingly rescued us, so will our future husband (when the time is right, which we don’t get to decide) lovingly pursue us and bring us to himself.
To be continued…
(I decided because there is so much more I want to say about this, I will talk more in my next post, maybe tomorrow, about biblical womanhood in relation to our desire for a godly man)
Friday, March 23, 2007
Where Have all the Theologians Gone?
Very rarely do I find myself in agreement with the contributors to the Christians for Biblical Equality and Today’s Christian Woman blog—but I must admit, when I ventured over there today, I was nodding my head in affirmation of what was being said (sort of).
The topic was women and theology, and the argument was made that so often women’s ministries simply settle for “fluff and feeling” leaving many women dissatisfied and alienated from women’s ministry—not to mention it leaves a tremendous void in the souls of the women. The post from the Today’s Christian Woman blog, dated February 27, talks about the absence women’s conferences, retreats, ministries, and bible studies that focus on the mind, in addition to the heart.
Rosalie De Rosset says,
“As an example, in the two or more decades I have been speaking at women’s conferences and retreats, I have often chosen to address the importance of good reading and solid Bible study in the Christian life. Often, the leadership has been hesitant when they hear my choice of subject, wondering if perhaps something more practical, more mainstream (dare I say predictable) would be a better subject—something like how to have devotions or how to discern the will of God or how to pray more successfully and consistently.”
Though a true statement, this saddens me. And even though I agree with the assessment that this woman has made, I don’t agree with this blog’s usual understanding of what womanhood is. I love theology, and I can hardly make it out of the church bookstore without purchasing another book that I don’t have time to read. I am frequently teased by my roommates for my Wish List selection on Amazon and my excitement over new books that I find. But I don’t love theology because I want to be a seminary professor or a pastor. First and foremost I love theology because I love God, and theology is knowing God. There is no excuse for a woman to say she does not care about theology—all of us should be vigorous students of the Word of God. Secondly, I love theology because I love seeing women embrace theology and understand it for the first time. I study so I may tell other women about Christ. If women do not have a clear understanding of biblical truth who will teach the next generation of women? Who will teach the children—the next generation of pastors?
And so, women should desire to know theology—but not because we want to be like men, but because we want to be like women. Theological insight is not relegated to men, it is for all people. All of us are commanded to love God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength. My prayer for my generation is that we would see a rise of women who embrace their role as biblical women and stand in the face of culture and feminism—yet stand because they know and love their Savior, not their feelings.
The topic was women and theology, and the argument was made that so often women’s ministries simply settle for “fluff and feeling” leaving many women dissatisfied and alienated from women’s ministry—not to mention it leaves a tremendous void in the souls of the women. The post from the Today’s Christian Woman blog, dated February 27, talks about the absence women’s conferences, retreats, ministries, and bible studies that focus on the mind, in addition to the heart.
Rosalie De Rosset says,
“As an example, in the two or more decades I have been speaking at women’s conferences and retreats, I have often chosen to address the importance of good reading and solid Bible study in the Christian life. Often, the leadership has been hesitant when they hear my choice of subject, wondering if perhaps something more practical, more mainstream (dare I say predictable) would be a better subject—something like how to have devotions or how to discern the will of God or how to pray more successfully and consistently.”
Though a true statement, this saddens me. And even though I agree with the assessment that this woman has made, I don’t agree with this blog’s usual understanding of what womanhood is. I love theology, and I can hardly make it out of the church bookstore without purchasing another book that I don’t have time to read. I am frequently teased by my roommates for my Wish List selection on Amazon and my excitement over new books that I find. But I don’t love theology because I want to be a seminary professor or a pastor. First and foremost I love theology because I love God, and theology is knowing God. There is no excuse for a woman to say she does not care about theology—all of us should be vigorous students of the Word of God. Secondly, I love theology because I love seeing women embrace theology and understand it for the first time. I study so I may tell other women about Christ. If women do not have a clear understanding of biblical truth who will teach the next generation of women? Who will teach the children—the next generation of pastors?
And so, women should desire to know theology—but not because we want to be like men, but because we want to be like women. Theological insight is not relegated to men, it is for all people. All of us are commanded to love God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength. My prayer for my generation is that we would see a rise of women who embrace their role as biblical women and stand in the face of culture and feminism—yet stand because they know and love their Savior, not their feelings.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Going to the Chapel: Where is the Tradition?
There is an article in Tuesday's USA Today entitled "More Men Taking Wive's Last Names" which talks about the rise of men legally taking on their wives names upon marriage. Apparently it doesn't always go over very well with the friends and family who are waiting for them in the receiving line.
At first glance it might not seem like a big deal, but piggy-backing off of my post yesterday, this too addresses a pressing issue in our culture. We have made marriage into whatever we want it to be. Gone are the days of godly, and stealing a word from John Piper, “lion-hearted and lamblike” days of male leadership. Now we have a new wave of young couples redefining what it actually means to live in wedded bliss.
What does this mean for us? Is it really a big deal if men take on the last names of their wives? It’s just a name right? Not really. The fact that men are spending $350 dollars to legally become the subordinate in the relationship is something that should make us think. One husband said “I wanted to tweak the tradition while showing my wife I love her."
That’s a far cry from the words of our God through the Apostle Paul in Ephesians 5:25 where he says, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Christ loved the church by leading her, protecting her, and dying for her. There is no question about roles and leadership in Christ’s relationship to His Bride the Church—yet His love for her is evident and undeniable.
So, what does this mean for us? If we embrace the idea that love means denying roles and changing “tradition” then we are showing the world that we have a Christ who abandons His Church—which is blasphemous and a hindrance to the spreading of the Gospel. The greatest act of love a husband can ever display to his wife is to love her as our Lord Jesus Christ so mercifully loved us. It’s not tradition that we are seeking to recover; it’s the authority of the Bible. Because after all, it’s not just a name—it’s an entire worldview.
At first glance it might not seem like a big deal, but piggy-backing off of my post yesterday, this too addresses a pressing issue in our culture. We have made marriage into whatever we want it to be. Gone are the days of godly, and stealing a word from John Piper, “lion-hearted and lamblike” days of male leadership. Now we have a new wave of young couples redefining what it actually means to live in wedded bliss.
What does this mean for us? Is it really a big deal if men take on the last names of their wives? It’s just a name right? Not really. The fact that men are spending $350 dollars to legally become the subordinate in the relationship is something that should make us think. One husband said “I wanted to tweak the tradition while showing my wife I love her."
That’s a far cry from the words of our God through the Apostle Paul in Ephesians 5:25 where he says, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Christ loved the church by leading her, protecting her, and dying for her. There is no question about roles and leadership in Christ’s relationship to His Bride the Church—yet His love for her is evident and undeniable.
So, what does this mean for us? If we embrace the idea that love means denying roles and changing “tradition” then we are showing the world that we have a Christ who abandons His Church—which is blasphemous and a hindrance to the spreading of the Gospel. The greatest act of love a husband can ever display to his wife is to love her as our Lord Jesus Christ so mercifully loved us. It’s not tradition that we are seeking to recover; it’s the authority of the Bible. Because after all, it’s not just a name—it’s an entire worldview.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Are Children a Choice?
Last night I was asked a question by a young woman that kept me thinking for the better part of today. Is it right, or wrong, for Christians to willingly choose to be childless? Voluntary childlessness is not uncommon in the day of the pro-choice movement and feminism—in fact, many young couples are now opting for childlessness for the sake of saving their careers. At first glance, it might seem like not a huge deal, because in actuality it really is their life, right? As Christians, we must always think of these things in light of the Word of God.
First, the Bible says “be fruitful and multiply” (Gen. 1:28, Gen. 9:1, Gen. 35:11). God wants His people to procreate—He created us to procreate. If Christians voluntarily choose to be childless, where will the next generation of Christians come from?
Second, all through the Old and New Testament we do not see willingly childless women. We see women desperately crying out to God to open up their wombs. Sarah, Rachel, Hannah, and Elizabeth all felt the sting of infertility in the fact that they could not, on their own, fulfill their role as mothers.
Third, children are a gift and not a choice. Aggressive feminist and abortion rights ideology has indoctrinated us with the idea that we can “choose” our family make-up. That is not what God intended. We must recover what has been lost and show to a lost world the beauty and blessing of biblical womanhood in bearing children. There are countless women who would give anything to have a little one, and I would venture to say that it is nothing less than a selfish, entitlement attitude that says we have a “right” to not have children. God is the one who opens and closes the womb, and married Christians should be open to the idea of children. The quest for a career should not cause the Christian to abandon the command to be fruitful and multiply.
As we look at the church today we must ask ourselves if the mass movement of young, Christian’s couples deciding to remain childless is actually a sign of the infiltration of culture into church life. We are seeing an erosion of Christian witness when we embrace cultural ideas, like delayed adulthood and childlessness, and make them our own.
John Piper in his message “Adoption: The Heart of the Gospel” clearly articulates the Christian response to children, and I close leaving you with his words. He answers the question far better than I ever could.
“Few things bring me more satisfaction than seeing a culture of adoption flourish at Bethlehem. It means that our people are looking to their heavenly Father for their joy rather than rejecting the stress and cost of children in order to maximize their freedom and comforts. When people embrace the pain and joy of children rather than using abortion or birth control simply to keep children away, the worth of Christ shines more visibly. Adoption is as far as possible from the mindset that rejects children as an intrusion. Praise God for people ready to embrace the suffering—known and unknown. God’s cost to adopt us was infinitely greater than any cost we will endure in adopting and raising children.” (Event Message, “Adoption the Heart of the Gospel, February 10, 2007: http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/EventMessages/ByDate/1991_Adoption_The_Heart_of_the_Gospel/)
Nothing shatters the pro-choice movement more than Christians willingly embracing the gift of children—especially children that are not “biologically” theirs. As women, we should desire motherhood, even if marriage and pregnancy are not on the horizon. Motherhood may never give us earthly wealth, power, or prestige. But our treasure is not here—our crown awaits us with our Heavenly Father. Unless we resolve to live counter-culturally in every aspect of our lives, we will have no voice with which to proclaim the Gospel—it will be washed up in the culture as we seek to selfishly obtain a crown here on earth. Adoption, children, and marriage are all things that God ordained to lift high His Son, Jesus Christ. May we be willing to renounce culture and entitlement and live according to His Word.
First, the Bible says “be fruitful and multiply” (Gen. 1:28, Gen. 9:1, Gen. 35:11). God wants His people to procreate—He created us to procreate. If Christians voluntarily choose to be childless, where will the next generation of Christians come from?
Second, all through the Old and New Testament we do not see willingly childless women. We see women desperately crying out to God to open up their wombs. Sarah, Rachel, Hannah, and Elizabeth all felt the sting of infertility in the fact that they could not, on their own, fulfill their role as mothers.
Third, children are a gift and not a choice. Aggressive feminist and abortion rights ideology has indoctrinated us with the idea that we can “choose” our family make-up. That is not what God intended. We must recover what has been lost and show to a lost world the beauty and blessing of biblical womanhood in bearing children. There are countless women who would give anything to have a little one, and I would venture to say that it is nothing less than a selfish, entitlement attitude that says we have a “right” to not have children. God is the one who opens and closes the womb, and married Christians should be open to the idea of children. The quest for a career should not cause the Christian to abandon the command to be fruitful and multiply.
As we look at the church today we must ask ourselves if the mass movement of young, Christian’s couples deciding to remain childless is actually a sign of the infiltration of culture into church life. We are seeing an erosion of Christian witness when we embrace cultural ideas, like delayed adulthood and childlessness, and make them our own.
John Piper in his message “Adoption: The Heart of the Gospel” clearly articulates the Christian response to children, and I close leaving you with his words. He answers the question far better than I ever could.
“Few things bring me more satisfaction than seeing a culture of adoption flourish at Bethlehem. It means that our people are looking to their heavenly Father for their joy rather than rejecting the stress and cost of children in order to maximize their freedom and comforts. When people embrace the pain and joy of children rather than using abortion or birth control simply to keep children away, the worth of Christ shines more visibly. Adoption is as far as possible from the mindset that rejects children as an intrusion. Praise God for people ready to embrace the suffering—known and unknown. God’s cost to adopt us was infinitely greater than any cost we will endure in adopting and raising children.” (Event Message, “Adoption the Heart of the Gospel, February 10, 2007: http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/EventMessages/ByDate/1991_Adoption_The_Heart_of_the_Gospel/)
Nothing shatters the pro-choice movement more than Christians willingly embracing the gift of children—especially children that are not “biologically” theirs. As women, we should desire motherhood, even if marriage and pregnancy are not on the horizon. Motherhood may never give us earthly wealth, power, or prestige. But our treasure is not here—our crown awaits us with our Heavenly Father. Unless we resolve to live counter-culturally in every aspect of our lives, we will have no voice with which to proclaim the Gospel—it will be washed up in the culture as we seek to selfishly obtain a crown here on earth. Adoption, children, and marriage are all things that God ordained to lift high His Son, Jesus Christ. May we be willing to renounce culture and entitlement and live according to His Word.
Volunteering with girls
Erika and I took a couple of our high school girls to help with an inner-city Bible club for kids in our neighborhood. The girls asked me to put pictures up on the blog, so I am fulfilling their wish. (Here you go Hannah and Whitney!)
Often times it is easy to go about my day and never really think about the fact that there are hundreds of children in my neighborhood who live in darkness and hopelessness. Many of them live only a few feet away from me while I bury my nose in a book or sit in front of CNN thinking about all of the horrors of the Fall in our world, when in actuality I don't need to go that far to see it--it's right accross the street.
And so, we went to help out with this kids club because we wanted aid in the spreading of the Gospel, but also we wanted to see what life was like outside of our comfort zone. May God keep us constantly burdened for the souls of the nations--even in our own neighborhoods, and may we not forget the children who fall asleep afraid and alone.
Often times it is easy to go about my day and never really think about the fact that there are hundreds of children in my neighborhood who live in darkness and hopelessness. Many of them live only a few feet away from me while I bury my nose in a book or sit in front of CNN thinking about all of the horrors of the Fall in our world, when in actuality I don't need to go that far to see it--it's right accross the street.
And so, we went to help out with this kids club because we wanted aid in the spreading of the Gospel, but also we wanted to see what life was like outside of our comfort zone. May God keep us constantly burdened for the souls of the nations--even in our own neighborhoods, and may we not forget the children who fall asleep afraid and alone.
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